10 in flight Kulula quotes that will have you laughing

10 in flight Kulula quotes that will have you laughing

The South African Kulula Airlines are well known for their humour when it comes to marketing and their livery.

For example, in 2010, they landed themselves in a spot of trouble for describing themselves as the Unofficial National Carrier of the You-Know-What during the FIFA World Cup in South Africa. Another advert announced “affordable flights to everybody except Sepp Blatter” (FIFA president), who was offered a free seat “for the duration of that thing that is happening right now”. Obviously a funny bunch, here are some Kulula quotes from various flights:

“Welcome aboard Kulula 271 to Port Elizabeth. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab in to the buckle and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt, and, if you don’t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn’t be out in public transport.”

“People, people, we’re not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it.”

“Kulula Airlines is pleased to announced that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!”

“There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only four ways out of this plane.”

“In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travelling with more than one small child, pick your favourite.”

“Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds but we’ll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Kulula Airlines.”

“That was quite a bump and I know what y’all are thinking. I’m here to tell you it wasn’t the airline’s fault, it wasn’t the pilot’s fault, it wasn’t the flight attendant’s fault, it was the asphault.”

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Mother City. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what’s left of our airplane to the gate.”

“Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted.”

“As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.”

What do you think? Looks like Southwest stole some of Kulula’s lines in their viral video…

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[Picture: Leon Homan on flickr]

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